
When You Are Dismissed
Medical gaslighting, chronic pain, and what it means to keep trusting yourself when your symptoms are questioned.
She glanced at my chart and asked, “Have you tried using a trigger point muscle hook tool?”
“I don’t know what that is,” I said.
She reached for one hanging behind the counter and hooked it around the base of my neck. The metal was cold. She yanked hard.
“Ow,” I flinched.
She smiled. “You’re tight. That’s why this will work.”
“What type of diet do you follow?”
My chart said neck pain. Occipital pain. Migraines. Not nutrition counseling.
“Keto. Paleo. Mediterranean,” she said, ticking them off. “I don’t eat much processed food.”
She nodded and looked back at the paper.
A drawer opened. A sheet slid out. She started writing without looking up, talking about inflammation and “clean eating.”
Forks Over Knives.
Disease Reversal Hope!
Prevent and Reverse Heart Disease.
Your Body in Balance - Neil Barnard
Nutritionfacts.org - Dr. Michael Greger.
“You’ll want to start here.” She pushed the list toward me.
“This will change everything.”
And in a sense, it did.
Just not as she meant. This is what being dismissed can do. It does not just delay answers. It changes how you enter the room.
I was no longer someone trying to be helped. I was now trying to be believed. I chose my words more carefully and shortened my story. You start editing yourself before anyone asks you to.
I didn’t lose my voice. I stopped leading with it.
FROM Now On
From truth.
From letting go.
From one small act of agency.
From gratitude.
This is where I return when my experience is questioned.
Not to convince.
Not to defend.
Just to stay grounded.
To let my own experience count, even when it isn’t echoed back.
To trust myself, without permission. Especially when the explanation in the room is too small for what I am carrying.

Where have you felt yourself grow quieter in order to be believed?
Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.
Benjamin Spock
Until next time,
-Monica

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